The Rooster to beat all Roosters

A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a special rooster—one that would service all of his many hens. When he told this to the market vendor, the vendor replied: “I have just the rooster for you. Henry here is the horniest rooster you will ever see!”

So the farmer took Henry back to the farm. Before setting him loose in the hen house, though, he gave Henry a little pep talk: “Henry,” he said, “I’m counting on you to do your stuff.” And without a word, Henry strutted into the henhouse. Henry was as fast as he was furious, mounting each hen like a thunderbolt. There was much squawking and many feathers flying, until Henry had finished having his way with each hen. But Henry didn’t stop there. Henry went into the barn and mounted all of the horses, one by one, and still at the same frantic pace. Then he went to the pig house, where he did the same. The farmer, watching all of this with disbelief cried out, “Stop, Henry!! You’ll kill yourself!!”

But Henry continued, seeking out each farm animal in the same manner Well, the next morning, the farmer looked out and saw Henry lying there on his lawn. His legs were up in the air, his eyes rolled back, and his long tongue hanging out. A buzzard was already circling above Henry. The farmer walked up to Henry saying, “Oh you poor thing, look what you did, you’ve gone and killed yourself. I warned you little buddy.”

“Shhhhhhh,” Henry whispered, “The buzzard’s getting closer.”

Letter From A Sikh Friend

I was standing at Jalandhar station when my attention went towards a Sikh youth standing near me wearing a black turban having a long beard and wearing a kirpan over his shirt looking similar to the classic terrorist pictures made popular by Bollywood movies & the Bhindranwale era.

After a while, one local train arrived, which was totally packed. The Sikh youth tried to get onto the train but failed to do so. Just then a voice was heard from the back coach 'Sardarji Barah Baj gaye' (Sir it's 12 o'clock!). The Sikh youth looked over at that voice maker who was a young mischievous type of person and instead of showing any anger smiled at him. The smile made was so enigmatic that it seemed as if some type of truth lies behind it. Not able to resist my temptation, I walked towards him and asked him why did he smile at that person who teased him. The Sikh youth replied, 'He was not teasing me but was asking for my help'. I was surprised with these words and he told me that there was a big history behind that which one should know. I was eager to know the history and the Sikh youth narrated:

During 17th Century, when Hindustan was ruled by Mughals, all the Hindu people were humiliated and were treated like animals. Mughals treated the Hindu women as their own property and were forcing all Hindus to convert to Islam and even used to behead people if they were refused to convert. That time, our ninth Guru, Sri Guru Teg Bahadurji came forward, in
response to a request by some Kashmiri Pandits to fight against all these cruel activities.

Guruji told the Mughal emperor that if he could succeed in converting him to Islam, all the Hindus would accept the same. But, if he failed, he should stop all those activities. The Mughal emperor happily agreed to that but even after lots of torture to Guruji and his fellow members, he failed to convert him to Islam and Guruji along with his other four fellow members, were tortured and sacrificed their lives in Chandni Chowk (Old Delhi )...That's why the Gurudwara there is named "Sheesh
Ganj"(Sheesh means head). Since the Mughals were unable to convert them to Islam they were beheaded. Thus Guruji sacrificed his life for the protection of Hindu religion. Can anybody lay down his life and that too for the protection of another religion? This is the reason he is still remembered as "Hind Ki Chaddar" (Shield of India). For the sake of whom he had sacrificed his life, none of the Hindus came forward to lift his body, fearing that they would also be assassinated. Seeing this incident our 10th Guruji, Sri Guru Gobind Singhji (Son of Guru Teg Bahadarji) founder of Khalsa made a resolution that he would convert his followers to such human beings who would not be able to hide themselves and could be easily located
in thousands.

At the start, the Sikhs were very few in numbers as they were fighting against the Mughal emperors. At that time, Nadir Shah raided Delhi in the year 1739 and looted Hindustan and was carrying lot of Hindustan treasures and nearly 2200 Hindu women along with him. The news spread like wild-fire and was heard by Sardar Jassa Singh who was the Commander of the
Sikh army at that time. He decided to attack Nadir Shah's Kafila on the same midnight. He did so and rescued all the Hindu women and they were safely sent to their homes. It didn't happen only once but thereafter whenever any Abdaalis or Iranis had attacked and looted Hindustan and were trying to carry the treasures and Hindu women along with them for selling them in Abdal markets, the Sikh army although fewer in numbers but brave hearted, always attacked them at midnight, 12 O'clock and rescued the Hindu women.

After that time whenever there occurred any similar incidents, people started to contact the Sikh army for their help and Sikhs used to attack the raiders at Midnight, 12 O'clock. Nowadays, these "smart people" and some Sikh enemies who are afraid of Sikhs, have spread these words that at 12 O'clock, the Sikhs go out of their senses. This historic fact was the reason which made me smile over that person's ignorance as I thought that his Mother or Sister would be in trouble and wants my
help and was reminding me by shouting aloud, 'Sardarji Barah Baj Gaye'

I just thought these little known facts about India should be brought out to our readers. Would love your feedback.

Cook-book recipe for Sperms

Scientists have proved for the first time that sperm grown from embryonic stem cells can be used to produce offspring.
The discovery in mice could ultimately help couples affected by male fertility problems to conceive. And by understanding embryo developmental processes better, a host of other diseases might be treated using stem cells, they say. The groundbreaking work is published in Developmental Cell.


The experiment was carried out using mice and produced seven babies, six of which lived to adulthood. However, many of the mice born from the artificial sperm died prematurely, and displayed abnormal growth patterns. And as well as the safety concerns, using stem cells to create sperm also raises ethical questions. Stem cells are special because they have the potential to develop into any tissue in the body. Professor Karim Nayernia and colleagues at the Georg-August University in Göttingen, Germany, took stem cells from a mouse embryo that was only a few days old and grew these cells in the laboratory.

Using a specialised sorting instrument they were able to isolate some stem cells that had begun to develop as sperm. They encouraged these early-stage sperm cells, known as spermatogonial stem cells, to grow into adult sperm cells and then injected some of these into female mouse eggs. The fertilised eggs grew and were successfully transplanted into female mice and produced seven babies. Professor Nayernia, who now works at Newcastle University in the UK, said: "For the first time we have created life using artificial sperm. This will help us to understand how men produce sperm and why some men are unable to do this. "If we understand this we can treat infertility in men."

In the future, men with fertility problems might be able to have their own stem cells harvested using a simple testicular biopsy, matured in the lab and then transplanted back. It is estimated that two in ten Indian couples have difficulty conceiving - about 200 million people. In about a third of all couples having IVF, male fertility is a contributory factor. About 1% of all men don't produce sperm and a further 3-4% of men have a low sperm count that could lead to infertility.

Dr Allan Pacey, senior lecturer in andrology at the University of Sheffield and honorary secretary of the British Fertility Society, said: "There are currently many things we don't know about how sperm are formed let alone why it sometimes goes wrong and leads to infertility in some men." He added: "It is more difficult to say whether artificial sperm produced this way could ultimately be used as a new treatment for male infertility. There are many technical, ethical and safety issues to be confronted before this could even be considered." Professor Harry Moore, professor of reproductive biology at the University of Sheffield, said: "These processes in the test-tube are far from perfect as the mice that were born by this process were abnormal. "We therefore have to be very cautious about using such techniques in therapies to treat men or women who are infertile due to a lack of germ stem cells until all safety aspects are resolved. This may take many years." Anna Smajdor, a researcher in medical ethics at Imperial College London, said: "The creation of viable sperm outside the body is a hugely significant breakthrough and offers great potential for stem cell research and fertility treatments. "However, sperm and eggs play a unique role in our understanding of kinship and parenthood, and being able to create these cells in the laboratory will pose a serious conceptual challenge for our society."

Professor John Burn, professor of clinical genetics at Newcastle University, believes stem cells will be a treatment for all types of diseases. "The same approach could ultimately allow us to control the development of liver cells, heart cells or brain cells...and make treatments for virtually any tissue that is damaged or diseased."

Welcome to the brave new world!

60 years of Independence & we have miles to go

Will our standards always remain 'Indian Standards"? All foreigners who have dealt with Indian companies are prepared for the worst. I have close Israeli friends who say nothing works better than greasing palms in India & Indian Standards mean 3 month delays & yet the world wants to do business with India because we are a rising economic power & no-one wants to miss the bus. But sadly, our "chalta-hai" attitude is so deeply ingrained into our system that sometimes I feel that we are genetically imprinted to be inferior than the western genome:(
Today, let me take you through my travails with a multinational that spends lakhs on advertsing and is a Citibank owned company-You Telecom that was known as Iquara Broadband. Let me tell you that whenever the service is 'working" it is above par & flawless, but they have a huge "down-time" and seem accountable to none of their customers. I sent them two letters which are reproduced as under but no one bothered to send an official reply - although today 15th August 2007, I finally got my internet connection in my office to work! Jai Hind!
Letter 1
You Telecom India Pvt Ltd
Ground Floor, No 1-C, Nirlon Complex
Off Western Express Highway
Goregaon (E), Mumbai 400063

Login: allah_g

Sir,
Let me introduce myself. I am a gynecologist practicing in Mumbai for the past 17 years. I have never faced such bad after-sales service from any service industry as I have experienced with You Telecom.

This is in regards to my connection (user id :allah_g) that we needed to transfer from our Flat in Diamond Apt (Mount Mary Road, Bandra) to our Flat at Kalpak Gulistan, Perry Cross Road Bandra(W). I approached your helpdesk initially in the first week of June 2007 with this request. There was no response at all for over a week. I next approached your Bandra office (Went there personally!). I was assured by some men sitting there that your representative would come and collect the Rs 500 transfer fee the next day. Nothing happened for another month.

My driver/peon/secretary all followed up in turns at your help-desk as well as in person at the Lucky buiding office. As of now, we keep calling up your helpdesk which has a standard answer saying "it is under process".

We have paid the transfer fee of Rs.500/- receipt no. 213629, and the name of the sales executive was Snehal; the payment was collected on 04/07/07 upon our insistence and was paid in cash. I am attaching herewith the receipt.

We have been calling your customer service line practically everyday and have spoken to your agents Amol/Pinal who repeatedly assured me that it will be done within the next 24 hours. However upon contacting them the next day all I heard was that the transfer was under process. I have prepaid for a year and have lost out on 2 months of my prepayment.

We have even sent our office boy to your office at Bandra but again no one has bothered to come and install the line. We have even brought the modem from the Diamond flat to theKalpak flat. All you need to do it send someone and install the line. Is it too much to ask for a service that has been already paid for?

Please ensure that my connection is transferred ASAP. I would also like your company to extend my plan by 60 days to compensate for the negligence on part of your team's indifference. I am shocked that this is a private player (and a multinational!).

I look forward to some responsible team leader sorting out my mess & weeding out the rot from your own organization.

I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely yours,
Gautam Allahbadia MD,DNB,FNAMS

Letter 2
14.08.2007
Dear Sir,
This is just a follow-up to my previous letter regards the terrible after sales service being meted out to YouTelecom customers such as myself. After nearly 70 days & my letter of complaint to you, some one from your office called me last Friday & assured me that my connection which was pre-paid for the entire year in March 2007 would finally start working on Saturday. On Saturday morning, your linesmen came in and laid down the cable for the net conection. The gentleman assured me he would send some engineer to start the net connection in the next hour since my line was already activated. Till date, I am still awaiting your engineer?
This speaks volumes for the control the senior team has on their staff in your organization! Pathetic! i plan to highlight the workings of YouTelecom from a customers viewpoint by Letters to the Editors of various dailies & on my own blog. Please find time to read: http://www.therotundaramblings.blogspot.com
Hoping against hope that someone will wake up-get my internet connection to work & compensate me for the time I have lost on your account.
Sincerely,
Gautam Allahbadia MD,DNB,FNAMS

I finally got the engineer to come in today & start the net in my clinic. Hopefully, You Telecom will compensate me for the 70 days of lost pre-paid service. Keep reading. It is not about the compensation that I am writing this blog! It is about our moral fibre & whether we will ever be humane , transparent & conscientious as the West.

My gut feeling is that the Rang De Basanti generation will change this country- Will change the mindset & hopefully throw out the corrupt old guard ruining our Nation!

Jai Maharashtra! Jai Hind!

PLEASE READ WITH THE APPROPRIATE ACCENT

Chinese Newlyweds :



A Chinese couple gets married - and she's a virgin. Truth be told, he is not too experienced either. On the wedding night, she cowers naked under the sheets as her husband undresses. He climbs in next to her and tries to be reassuring "My darring" he says, "I know dis yo firss time and you berry frighten. I pomise you, I give you anyting you want, I do anyting - juss anyting you want.. Whatchou want?" he says, trying to sound experienced, which he hopes will impress his virgin bride.



A thoughtful silence follows and he waits patiently (and eagerly) for her request. She eventually replies shyly and unsure, "I want to try somethin I have heard about .. numbaa 69". More thoughtful silence, this time from him. Eventually, in a puzzled tone he queries... "You want... Chicken wiff Broccori?"

'Piss-Screen' toilet game et al

My brother is an orthopedic surgeon and a gadget freak! He keeps me updated with whats happening in the world of gizmos & gadgets. Thanks to him, we have a state of the art video documentation & archiving system at Rotunda. Anything new that can refine our documenting abilities is incorporated as soon as feasible. After yesterdays blog, I thought our readers must hear of the Piss-Screen!


Unusual shock tactics here. A new toilet-based computer game intended to help tackle drink-driving was tested in bars and clubs around Frankfurt last week. Playing on a weakness of all drinkers - their bladders - the Piss-Screen is a pressure-sensitive inlay for urinals that lets you play a computer game while you wee. Based on Need for Speed, players steer a car round a course by aiming left or right as necessary. It's all relatively entertaining, until the game terminates in a horrifying crash sequence followed by the message: "Too pissed to drive? Take a Taxi instead".

In lighter news, in California the world's largest camera made it into the Guinness Book of Records on Monday after taking the largest photograph in the world. Made from an old aircraft hangar, the top of the camera stood a towering 44 foot off the ground. It took 10 days to expose the 31 by 111 foot picture.

Now, don't give up the cool box yet, but the iDrink solar swimware line for men could be about to revolutionise summer outdoor drinking. So much better than the female Solar Bikini , the iDrink combines the best bits of a summer's day: the beach, good tunes and beer. Not only do the shorts charge your iPod while you lie in the sun, they also generate enough power to keep your beer cool as well. Truly inspired.

Keep checking this space for gadgets-gizmos & medical discoveries:)

TheParkYourNutsStool

Just could not resist uploading this picture. Must be one of the coolest inventions ever:)