To our neighbors, my wife, Nancy, and I don't appear in the least unusual. To those in the quiet Oregon community where we live, we are viewed just as we are -- a happy couple deeply in love. Our desire to work hard, buy our first home, and start a
family was nothing out of the ordinary. That is, until we decided that I would carry our child.
I am transgender, legally male, and legally married to Nancy. Unlike those in same-sex marriages, domestic partnerships, or civil unions, Nancy and I are afforded the more than 1,100 federal rights of marriage. Sterilization is not a requirement for sex
reassignment, so I decided to have chest reconstruction and testosterone therapy but kept my reproductive rights. Wanting to have a biological child is neither a male nor female desire, but a human desire.
Ten years ago, when Nancy and I became a couple, the idea of us having a child was more dream than plan. I always wanted to have children. However, due to severe endometriosis 20 years ago, Nancy had to undergo a hysterectomy and is unable to
carry a child. But after the success of our custom screen-printing business and a move from Hawaii to the Pacific Northwest two years ago, the timing finally seemed right. I stopped taking my bimonthly testosterone injections. It had been roughly
eight years since I had my last menstrual cycle, so this wasn't a decision that I took lightly. My body regulated itself after about four months, and I didn't have to take any exogenous estrogen, progesterone, or fertility drugs to aid my pregnancy.
Our situation sparks legal, political, and social unknowns. We have only begun experiencing opposition from people who are upset by our situation. Doctors have discriminated against us, turning us away due to their religious beliefs. Health care
professionals have refused to call me by a male pronoun or recognize Nancy as my wife. Receptionists have laughed at us. Friends and family have been unsupportive; most of Nancy's family doesn't even know I'm transgender. This whole process, from trying to get pregnant to being pregnant, has been a challenge for us. The first doctor we approached was a reproductive endocrinologist.
He was shocked by our situation and told me to shave my facial hair. After a $300 consultation, he reluctantly performed my initial checkups. He then required us to see the clinic's psychologist to see if we were fit to bring a child into this world and
consulted with the ethics board of his hospital. A few months and a couple thousand dollars later, he told us that he would no longer treat us, saying he and his staff felt uncomfortable working with "someone like me." In total, nine different doctors have been involved. This is why it took over one year to get access to a cryogenic sperm bank to purchase anonymous donor vials, and why Nancy and I eventually resorted to home insemination. When I finally got pregnant for the first time, I ended up having an ectopic pregnancy with triplets. It was a life-threatening event that required surgical intervention, resulting in the loss of all embryos and my right fallopian tube. When my brother found out about my loss, he said, "It's a good thing that happened. Who knows what kind of monster it would have been."
On successfully getting pregnant a second time, we are proud to announce that this pregnancy is free of complications and our baby girl has a clean bill of health. We are happily awaiting her birth, with an estimated due date of July 3, 2008. How does it feel to be a pregnant man? Incredible. Despite the fact that my belly is growing with a new life inside me, I am stable and confident being the man that I am. In a technical sense I see myself as my own surrogate, though my gender identity as male is constant. To Nancy, I am her husband carrying our child -- I am so lucky to have such a loving, supportive wife. I will be my daughter's father, and Nancy will be her mother. We will be a family. Outside the local medical community, people don't know I'm five months' pregnant. But our situation ultimately will ask everyone to embrace the gamut of human possibility and to define for themselves what is normal.
By Thomas Beatie
View this story online at: http://www.alternet.org/story/80450/
The Ramblings of a Middle Aged Fertility Physician whose life revolves around Eggs, Sperms & Embryos....
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Captain Hook
A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a wooden leg, a hook on the end of his arm, and an eye patch.
The seaman asks "So, how did you end up with the wooden leg?"
The pirate replies "We were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out of the sea, a shark bit off my leg."
"Wow!" said the seaman. "What about your hook"?
"Well.....", replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut off my hand."
"Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch"?
"A seagull dropping fell into my eye.", replied the pirate.
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?" the sailor asked incredulously.
"Well.....", said the pirate, ".....it was my first day with the hook............"
Monday, March 31, 2008
Cancer scan reveals surprise for mum, 57
A 57-year-old woman has become one of the oldest first time mothers in the UK, after initially being told that her pregnancy could be ovarian cancer. Eight weeks prior to giving birth, Susan Tollefsen was sent for emergency hospital tests on a growing swelling, suspected to be ovarian cancer, only to be told by the sonographer that she was 30 weeks pregnant. Ms Tollefsen, a teacher, and her partner Nick Mayer, had been attempting to conceive for several years, but in the UK IVF is not funded for women over 40. The couple had travelled to a Moscow clinic to have fertility treatment using donor eggs, which had been fertilised with Mr Mayer's sperm. In August last year Ms Tollefsen was taken to hospital having suffered a suspected miscarriage, which appeared to be confirmed by blood tests. A later examination revealed an abdominal mass, which then turned out to be the pregnancy. Ms Tollefsen believes that she miscarried one of her twins, and that the other one survived.
Nine weeks after the scan revealed the pregnancy, Ms Tollefsen's daughter Freya was born by caesarean section, weighing 6lb 6oz. Ms Tollefsen said, 'the doctor held her up, I took one look and burst into tears'. Medical checks confirmed that Freya was healthy and had developed normally.
In 2006, 62-year old Patricia Rashbrook became the UK's oldest woman to have a child, following treatment with donor eggs carried out in Eastern Europe. The oldest woman in the world to have given birth following fertility treatment is Adriana Iliescu, a Romanian woman, who gave birth aged 66 in 2005. Clinics in the UK are not likely to treat women in their fifties and sixties - even though it is not illegal to do so, most clinics have an upper age limit and few would treat women over the age of 45.
Nine weeks after the scan revealed the pregnancy, Ms Tollefsen's daughter Freya was born by caesarean section, weighing 6lb 6oz. Ms Tollefsen said, 'the doctor held her up, I took one look and burst into tears'. Medical checks confirmed that Freya was healthy and had developed normally.
In 2006, 62-year old Patricia Rashbrook became the UK's oldest woman to have a child, following treatment with donor eggs carried out in Eastern Europe. The oldest woman in the world to have given birth following fertility treatment is Adriana Iliescu, a Romanian woman, who gave birth aged 66 in 2005. Clinics in the UK are not likely to treat women in their fifties and sixties - even though it is not illegal to do so, most clinics have an upper age limit and few would treat women over the age of 45.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Friday, March 28, 2008
Akshardam
After 5 years of non-stop, round-the-clock construction, the massive and awesome Akshardham Temple Monument to World Peace was inaugurated in 2005. The Akshardham Temple in New Delhi, India , constructed by the BAPS foundation -- the builders of the various Swaminaryan Temples across the world, is truely a modern day Wonder of the World.
It is one of the biggest and most intricate religious places of worship ever constructed. Combining several completely different and contrasting architectural styles of Hindu temple architecture of northern India -- Rajasthani, Orrisi, Gujarati, Mughal and Jain -- the Akshardham Monument is entirely constructed of marble and the red-sandstone that Delhi is famous for, and that so many of her monuments are constructed of. It was completed in only 5 years; a world record of sorts . So after years of waiting, the Temple was opened to the public on the 8th of November 2005 -- and to photographers. Below is the New Delhi Akshardham Complex as seen through the eyes of a BAPS photographer.
At its inaguration, it is widely being heralded as one of the greatest monuments India has ever produced. I hope you enjoy viewing this architectual marvel as much as I enjoy having the pleasure of presenting it to our blogeurs.
The Akshardham monument, built without steel, is entirely composed of sandstone and marble. It consists of 234 ornately carved pillars, 9 ornate domes, 20 quadrangled shikhars, a spectacular Gajendra Pith (plinth of stone elephants) and 20,000 murtis and statues of India's great sadhus, devotees, acharyas and divine personalities. The monument is a fusion of several architectural styles of pink stone and pure white marble. Pink stone symbolizes bhakti (devotion) in eternal bloom and white marble of absolute purity and eternal peace. The monument was built after over 300 million man hours of services rendered by 11,000 volunteers, sadhus and artisans.
It is truly one of the wonders of the modern world, and the wonders of modern India!
Thursday, March 27, 2008
The Income Tax Inspector
A father walks into a market with his young son. The kid is holding a Rupee coin. Suddenly, the boy starts choking and gasping for breath. The dad realizes the boy has swallowed the coin and starts panicking, shouting for help.
A well dressed, serious looking woman is sitting at a tea stall in the market reading her newspaper and sipping a cup of tea.
At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her Tea cup down , neatly folds the newspaper, places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the market. Reaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's testicles and starts to squeeze, gently at first and then ever more firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the coin, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand. Releasing the boy, she hands the coin to the father and walks back to the Tea stall without saying a word.
As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, 'I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?'
No,' the woman replied, 'I work for the Income Tax Dept.
A well dressed, serious looking woman is sitting at a tea stall in the market reading her newspaper and sipping a cup of tea.
At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her Tea cup down , neatly folds the newspaper, places it on the counter, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the market. Reaching the boy, the woman carefully takes hold of the boy's testicles and starts to squeeze, gently at first and then ever more firmly. After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the coin, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand. Releasing the boy, she hands the coin to the father and walks back to the Tea stall without saying a word.
As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no lasting ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, 'I've never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?'
No,' the woman replied, 'I work for the Income Tax Dept.
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