60 years of Independence & we have miles to go

Will our standards always remain 'Indian Standards"? All foreigners who have dealt with Indian companies are prepared for the worst. I have close Israeli friends who say nothing works better than greasing palms in India & Indian Standards mean 3 month delays & yet the world wants to do business with India because we are a rising economic power & no-one wants to miss the bus. But sadly, our "chalta-hai" attitude is so deeply ingrained into our system that sometimes I feel that we are genetically imprinted to be inferior than the western genome:(
Today, let me take you through my travails with a multinational that spends lakhs on advertsing and is a Citibank owned company-You Telecom that was known as Iquara Broadband. Let me tell you that whenever the service is 'working" it is above par & flawless, but they have a huge "down-time" and seem accountable to none of their customers. I sent them two letters which are reproduced as under but no one bothered to send an official reply - although today 15th August 2007, I finally got my internet connection in my office to work! Jai Hind!
Letter 1
You Telecom India Pvt Ltd
Ground Floor, No 1-C, Nirlon Complex
Off Western Express Highway
Goregaon (E), Mumbai 400063

Login: allah_g

Sir,
Let me introduce myself. I am a gynecologist practicing in Mumbai for the past 17 years. I have never faced such bad after-sales service from any service industry as I have experienced with You Telecom.

This is in regards to my connection (user id :allah_g) that we needed to transfer from our Flat in Diamond Apt (Mount Mary Road, Bandra) to our Flat at Kalpak Gulistan, Perry Cross Road Bandra(W). I approached your helpdesk initially in the first week of June 2007 with this request. There was no response at all for over a week. I next approached your Bandra office (Went there personally!). I was assured by some men sitting there that your representative would come and collect the Rs 500 transfer fee the next day. Nothing happened for another month.

My driver/peon/secretary all followed up in turns at your help-desk as well as in person at the Lucky buiding office. As of now, we keep calling up your helpdesk which has a standard answer saying "it is under process".

We have paid the transfer fee of Rs.500/- receipt no. 213629, and the name of the sales executive was Snehal; the payment was collected on 04/07/07 upon our insistence and was paid in cash. I am attaching herewith the receipt.

We have been calling your customer service line practically everyday and have spoken to your agents Amol/Pinal who repeatedly assured me that it will be done within the next 24 hours. However upon contacting them the next day all I heard was that the transfer was under process. I have prepaid for a year and have lost out on 2 months of my prepayment.

We have even sent our office boy to your office at Bandra but again no one has bothered to come and install the line. We have even brought the modem from the Diamond flat to theKalpak flat. All you need to do it send someone and install the line. Is it too much to ask for a service that has been already paid for?

Please ensure that my connection is transferred ASAP. I would also like your company to extend my plan by 60 days to compensate for the negligence on part of your team's indifference. I am shocked that this is a private player (and a multinational!).

I look forward to some responsible team leader sorting out my mess & weeding out the rot from your own organization.

I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely yours,
Gautam Allahbadia MD,DNB,FNAMS

Letter 2
14.08.2007
Dear Sir,
This is just a follow-up to my previous letter regards the terrible after sales service being meted out to YouTelecom customers such as myself. After nearly 70 days & my letter of complaint to you, some one from your office called me last Friday & assured me that my connection which was pre-paid for the entire year in March 2007 would finally start working on Saturday. On Saturday morning, your linesmen came in and laid down the cable for the net conection. The gentleman assured me he would send some engineer to start the net connection in the next hour since my line was already activated. Till date, I am still awaiting your engineer?
This speaks volumes for the control the senior team has on their staff in your organization! Pathetic! i plan to highlight the workings of YouTelecom from a customers viewpoint by Letters to the Editors of various dailies & on my own blog. Please find time to read: http://www.therotundaramblings.blogspot.com
Hoping against hope that someone will wake up-get my internet connection to work & compensate me for the time I have lost on your account.
Sincerely,
Gautam Allahbadia MD,DNB,FNAMS

I finally got the engineer to come in today & start the net in my clinic. Hopefully, You Telecom will compensate me for the 70 days of lost pre-paid service. Keep reading. It is not about the compensation that I am writing this blog! It is about our moral fibre & whether we will ever be humane , transparent & conscientious as the West.

My gut feeling is that the Rang De Basanti generation will change this country- Will change the mindset & hopefully throw out the corrupt old guard ruining our Nation!

Jai Maharashtra! Jai Hind!

PLEASE READ WITH THE APPROPRIATE ACCENT

Chinese Newlyweds :



A Chinese couple gets married - and she's a virgin. Truth be told, he is not too experienced either. On the wedding night, she cowers naked under the sheets as her husband undresses. He climbs in next to her and tries to be reassuring "My darring" he says, "I know dis yo firss time and you berry frighten. I pomise you, I give you anyting you want, I do anyting - juss anyting you want.. Whatchou want?" he says, trying to sound experienced, which he hopes will impress his virgin bride.



A thoughtful silence follows and he waits patiently (and eagerly) for her request. She eventually replies shyly and unsure, "I want to try somethin I have heard about .. numbaa 69". More thoughtful silence, this time from him. Eventually, in a puzzled tone he queries... "You want... Chicken wiff Broccori?"

'Piss-Screen' toilet game et al

My brother is an orthopedic surgeon and a gadget freak! He keeps me updated with whats happening in the world of gizmos & gadgets. Thanks to him, we have a state of the art video documentation & archiving system at Rotunda. Anything new that can refine our documenting abilities is incorporated as soon as feasible. After yesterdays blog, I thought our readers must hear of the Piss-Screen!


Unusual shock tactics here. A new toilet-based computer game intended to help tackle drink-driving was tested in bars and clubs around Frankfurt last week. Playing on a weakness of all drinkers - their bladders - the Piss-Screen is a pressure-sensitive inlay for urinals that lets you play a computer game while you wee. Based on Need for Speed, players steer a car round a course by aiming left or right as necessary. It's all relatively entertaining, until the game terminates in a horrifying crash sequence followed by the message: "Too pissed to drive? Take a Taxi instead".

In lighter news, in California the world's largest camera made it into the Guinness Book of Records on Monday after taking the largest photograph in the world. Made from an old aircraft hangar, the top of the camera stood a towering 44 foot off the ground. It took 10 days to expose the 31 by 111 foot picture.

Now, don't give up the cool box yet, but the iDrink solar swimware line for men could be about to revolutionise summer outdoor drinking. So much better than the female Solar Bikini , the iDrink combines the best bits of a summer's day: the beach, good tunes and beer. Not only do the shorts charge your iPod while you lie in the sun, they also generate enough power to keep your beer cool as well. Truly inspired.

Keep checking this space for gadgets-gizmos & medical discoveries:)

TheParkYourNutsStool

Just could not resist uploading this picture. Must be one of the coolest inventions ever:)

Little Whittled Thumbs

Rather than buying a phone with a bigger keypad, a "large" American man had his thumbs "surgically altered" to allow him to use his iPhone with greater accuracy, the North Denver News alleged earlier last week. Thomas Martel, 28, of Bonnie Brae is a big guy. So he has a hard time using the features on ever-shrinking user interfaces on devices like his new iPhone. At least, he did, until he had his thumbs surgically altered in a revolutionary new surgical technique known as "whittling." "From my old Treo, to my Blackberry, to this new iPhone, I had a hard time hitting the right buttons, and I always lost those little styluses," explains Martel. "Sure, the procedure was expensive, but when I think of all the time I save by being able to use modern handhelds so much faster, I really think the surgery will pay for itself in ten to fifteen years. And what it's saving me in frustration - that's priceless."
"This is really, on the edge sort of stuff," explains Dr. Robert Fox Spars, who worked on developing the procedure. "We're turning plastic surgery from something that people use in service of vanity, to a real tool for improving workplace efficiency." The procedure involved making a small incision into both thumbs and shaving down the bones, followed by careful muscular alteration and modification of the fingernails. While Martel's new thumbs now appear small and effeminate in comparison to his otherwise very large hands, he says he can still lift "pretty much anything I could lift before the surgery - though opening spaghetti sauce jars has been a problem. That was a big surprise."

The procedure - known, apparently, as "whittling" - involved a small incision being made into both his thumbs, before the digits were shaved down to the bone. Horrific. Believe it or not, the situation could have been stranger. The operation could have been preformed with the help of GPS technology, which last week made the news for its increasing popularity as a surgical application in joint replacement surgery. Whew! What a way to begin my week:)

Photo on the Nightstand

After a long night of making love, he notices a framed photo of a good looking man on the nightstand by her bed.


He begins to worry.


"Is this your husband?" he nervously asks.


"No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him.


"Your boyfriend, then?" he continues.


No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear.


"Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured.


"No, no, no!!!" she answers.


"Well, who in the hell is he then?" he demands.


"That's me before the surgery."

Getting the Mechanics

There was a Gynecologist who decided he no longer wanted to practice. Instead he wanted to restore old cars. To prepare himself for this career change, he signed up for a mechanics course in engine repair. He studied really hard, and the day arrived for the final exam. The task was to find out what was wrong with the engine and repair it. The Gynecologist took a little longer than the rest of the class, but he got the job done. A couple of days later he went to see how he did. Up on the wall, beside his name he saw a mark of 150%. He was really puzzled so he went to the instructor. "How can this be?" he asked. The instructor replied, "Well, I gave you 50 points for figuring out the problem, and 50 points more for solving the problem. But I had to give you an extra 50 points for doing all the work through the exhaust pipe!"