Friday, April 18, 2008
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Blond Genes
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a "handywoman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood.
She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?"
The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"
The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would
need was in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"
He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all
those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" the husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it
to her.
"And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus".
She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?"
The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"
The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would
need was in the garage.
The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"
He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all
those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" the husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it
to her.
"And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus".
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Ice, ice, baby!
A couple from Stockport, Greater Manchester, have conceived a second baby using sperm frozen 19 years ago. Emmanuel and Zoe Iyoha are expecting their second child after receiving IVF treatment using sperm preserved on Mr Iyoha's behalf in 1989.
Mr Iyoha was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma and a tumour on his spleen when he was 27 years old. Staff at the Christie Hospital in Manchester warned him that the chemotherapy would leave him infertile and encouraged him to have his sperm frozen so that he would have the option of having children after he recovered. Mr Iyoha expressed his gratitude,
saying: 'it was the Christie nurses who persuaded me it was something that I should do and I will be forever grateful to them for this miracle. They must have seen within me the father-in-waiting. At the time, I was far more preoccupied with the cancer'.
Mr Iyoha, a computer expert for the NHS, has had a long battle with his cancer, but is now in remission after suffering a relapse in 1995. He married Zoe, a teacher, in 2002 and the newly-wed couple were only able to consider having children together thanks to the sperm stored at St Mary's Hospital in Manchester. 'We're certainly pretty unlikely to have an unplanned pregnancy after two bouts of chemotherapy' commented My Iyoha.
Freezing sperm is the only chance many men who face chemotherapy at a young age have of preserving their fertility. Unfortunately, however, the technique does not always work, as the sperm may be left too damaged by the freezing and thawing process for IVF to be successful. It took Mr and Mrs Iyoha 12 rounds of IVF treatment including, sadly, one miscarriage before their first child, Poppy Rose, was born in 2006. Remarkably, they have conceived their second child, which is due in July, after just four rounds of IVF.
Mr Iyoha said: 'every time I think about how long it has been since my sperm was frozen I am amazed at the power of science'. He added: 'we owe it all to science and the wonderful care and support of the staff at Christie's and St. Mary's'. In 2004, doctors at St Mary's hospital reported the birth of baby conceived using sperm that had been frozen for 21 years, believed to
be the longest reported storage period for sperm successfully used for treatment.
Mr Iyoha was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin's lymphoma and a tumour on his spleen when he was 27 years old. Staff at the Christie Hospital in Manchester warned him that the chemotherapy would leave him infertile and encouraged him to have his sperm frozen so that he would have the option of having children after he recovered. Mr Iyoha expressed his gratitude,
saying: 'it was the Christie nurses who persuaded me it was something that I should do and I will be forever grateful to them for this miracle. They must have seen within me the father-in-waiting. At the time, I was far more preoccupied with the cancer'.
Mr Iyoha, a computer expert for the NHS, has had a long battle with his cancer, but is now in remission after suffering a relapse in 1995. He married Zoe, a teacher, in 2002 and the newly-wed couple were only able to consider having children together thanks to the sperm stored at St Mary's Hospital in Manchester. 'We're certainly pretty unlikely to have an unplanned pregnancy after two bouts of chemotherapy' commented My Iyoha.
Freezing sperm is the only chance many men who face chemotherapy at a young age have of preserving their fertility. Unfortunately, however, the technique does not always work, as the sperm may be left too damaged by the freezing and thawing process for IVF to be successful. It took Mr and Mrs Iyoha 12 rounds of IVF treatment including, sadly, one miscarriage before their first child, Poppy Rose, was born in 2006. Remarkably, they have conceived their second child, which is due in July, after just four rounds of IVF.
Mr Iyoha said: 'every time I think about how long it has been since my sperm was frozen I am amazed at the power of science'. He added: 'we owe it all to science and the wonderful care and support of the staff at Christie's and St. Mary's'. In 2004, doctors at St Mary's hospital reported the birth of baby conceived using sperm that had been frozen for 21 years, believed to
be the longest reported storage period for sperm successfully used for treatment.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
'Internet sperm' founder jailed
John Gonzalez, the founding director of a controversial UK-based online company - 'ManNotIncluded.com', which delivered fresh sperm to women for DIY-insemination - was sentenced last week at the Wood Green Crown Court in London to sixteen months incarceration for five counts of fraudulent activities. Judge Juliet May QC said that he had 'siphoned off thousands of
pounds' in a 'sustained course of fraudulent conduct' and banned him from being a company director for five years.
The Department of Business, Enterprise and Regulatory Reform (BERR) led the investigation, which uncovered shocking business practices - including one client receiving sperm in a dirty coffee canister, while two former employees describe how women were given sperm from donors with completely different characteristics than requested. Gonzalez was successfully
prosecuted for lying to officials, forging documents and falsifying debts to evade relinquishing assets to creditors while illegally embezzling those funds to support an opulent lifestyle. Ultimately, he pleaded guilty to two counts of fraudulent trading, one count of financial misconduct, one count of forgery and one count of perjury.
Gonzalez launched the online business June 2002 amidst stormy criticism, claiming the website was the world's first to courier fresh sperm and insemination equipment directly to lesbian, single and medically infertile couples who paid to register on the site, charging up to £7,000 for delivery. Some critics viewed the service as a threat to the family unit and dubbed the site 'morals not included'.
Gonzalez's service illustrated a loophole in current UK regulation, which governs frozen gamete storage and use, but not 'fresh' sperm. Medical practitioners and government authorities warned that this kind of service poses a potential threat to women's and the resulting child's health because the fresh sperm is not screened for any diseases. The Human Fertilisation and Embryology 1990 Act requires sperm donations to be quarantined for up to 180 days for testing. Some infections such as HIV may take up to three months to incubate, meaning that an HIV test at the time of the donation may not detect the virus even though the donor might be carrying it.
The service also presented potential legal complications. Under UK law, donors whose sperm is obtained through HFEA licensed clinics are not the legal parents of any resulting offspring. However, the legal position on the parentage of children born via sperm donated outside of HFEA license is unclear.
Gonzalez maintains that ManNotIncluded.com boasted 20 pregnancies and more than 5,000 customers. In December 2004, Gonzalez illegally liquidated the company with debt totalling over £220,000 and then continued to trade under a slightly different name. Meanwhile, he embezzled £185,000 from these company accounts.
pounds' in a 'sustained course of fraudulent conduct' and banned him from being a company director for five years.
The Department of Business, Enterprise and Regulatory Reform (BERR) led the investigation, which uncovered shocking business practices - including one client receiving sperm in a dirty coffee canister, while two former employees describe how women were given sperm from donors with completely different characteristics than requested. Gonzalez was successfully
prosecuted for lying to officials, forging documents and falsifying debts to evade relinquishing assets to creditors while illegally embezzling those funds to support an opulent lifestyle. Ultimately, he pleaded guilty to two counts of fraudulent trading, one count of financial misconduct, one count of forgery and one count of perjury.
Gonzalez launched the online business June 2002 amidst stormy criticism, claiming the website was the world's first to courier fresh sperm and insemination equipment directly to lesbian, single and medically infertile couples who paid to register on the site, charging up to £7,000 for delivery. Some critics viewed the service as a threat to the family unit and dubbed the site 'morals not included'.
Gonzalez's service illustrated a loophole in current UK regulation, which governs frozen gamete storage and use, but not 'fresh' sperm. Medical practitioners and government authorities warned that this kind of service poses a potential threat to women's and the resulting child's health because the fresh sperm is not screened for any diseases. The Human Fertilisation and Embryology 1990 Act requires sperm donations to be quarantined for up to 180 days for testing. Some infections such as HIV may take up to three months to incubate, meaning that an HIV test at the time of the donation may not detect the virus even though the donor might be carrying it.
The service also presented potential legal complications. Under UK law, donors whose sperm is obtained through HFEA licensed clinics are not the legal parents of any resulting offspring. However, the legal position on the parentage of children born via sperm donated outside of HFEA license is unclear.
Gonzalez maintains that ManNotIncluded.com boasted 20 pregnancies and more than 5,000 customers. In December 2004, Gonzalez illegally liquidated the company with debt totalling over £220,000 and then continued to trade under a slightly different name. Meanwhile, he embezzled £185,000 from these company accounts.
Monday, April 14, 2008
World's Largest Swimming Pool
Can you believe this place in Chile? Imagine doing 10 laps of this pool lengthwise! On a jet-ski maybe. It is 1.3 kms long, 800 mtrs wide (8/10 of a mile long by 1/2 mile wide) at its shortest point and varies from ankle depth to 8 mtrs deep.
It employs 41 life guards and has lifesaving devices which pop out of the bottom in various locations in case of rescue requirements. Built jointly by Korean/Japanese interests, it's expected to have a business life scale of 15 years. Wonder how they clean the thing?
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Cheap Trick
A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands their money.
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did." The robber then shot him in the temple, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did."
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did." The robber then shot him in the temple, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did."
Saturday, April 12, 2008
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